Monday, January 08, 2007

On Thin Ice

A friend of mine is on thin ice. Perhaps she’s already wet, I don’t know.

Our friendship began with a bang in that she was like a sister I never had. Through laughter, theological discussion, and background similarities we found we had a lot in common. She has a bang-up husband and family, too, making the whole deal sweet.

We’ve eaten together, prayed and watched movies together, put on seminars together, and done all kinds of great friendship things. We love them, they love us.

All at once, she jumped ship and left her husband and family, saying she had been living a lie all along and needed to be who she really was, live life on her own terms. Everyone was devastated and left grasping air.

Months have gone by and it hasn’t gotten any better. But here’s what I’ve done—I’ve emailed her maybe a dozen times, called her about the same, spoken with her perhaps three or four times (she doesn’t answer my calls anymore), and prayed for her so many times. You can imagine that she doesn’t actually want to talk with me, since my counsel is contrary to the way she’s headed. And I’ve talked and grieved and loved with everyone in her family, drawing close in the ugly fight. And everybody’s love is taking a beating.

But I don’t just tell her to quit what she’s doing, I remind her who she is from the most-true perspective; that she’s a daughter of God, and, having been chosen before the creation of the world, she’s been made a blameless and holy vessel of God. My hope is that by telling her who she is and by telling her the great news of her hope in Christ, she will come to her senses and embrace anew the Lord Jesus.

So far, nothing seems to have happened toward that end. In fact, she seems worse. And the news I get about her is saddening. Our friendship is lost, at least for now, but it feels worse, like my friend is rejecting a readily had cure, preferring to die instead.

What rescues me (and, I hope, her) is the knowledge of how unrelenting her Father is, how sure His plan is, and how much He loves her. This isn’t the first time one of His own has been caught in a terrible situation—ask King David, and just about anyone else chosen by God. Although she is resisting Him now, He will not be denied.

If even she falls through the ice, He will be there with her.

My hope is with Him.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous5:53 PM

    Thank you for writing about this, Ralph. I've faced this several times with friends of mine, and it's good to know how you've been handling it.

    It's tough, but I suppose it should be. Thanks for the encouragement.