After mentioning a Christian guy’s name, a friend of mine and I suddenly realized that we each knew him. My friend said, “Yeah, he’s an alcoholic.” And two things occurred to me: he had gone blind to this mutual friend, and both of them were injured as a result.
2 Corinthians 5: 16 So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. 17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation: the old has gone, the new has come! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation.
If we're going to help people, we must choose the true, new creation view of them, and assist them in Christ. That helps them most, and keeps us from reckless and futile attempts that fail and frustrate us.